I decided today, it being a new year and everything, to finally work on my one goal: To find myself! I guess I’m not actually lost physically, but as you might have guessed from my previous posts, I’m all about the inner journey, and so my uprooted existence and reliance on others, two things that un-nerve me THE most, have forced me to look at myself and ask the hard questions (that I never thought I’d ask). What I’ve discovered is that I don’t know what I want. I’m torn in too many directions and so I’m left deciding what is or isn’t really me. I’m sure you all have felt this way at least once, maybe? Well, it’s something that has consumed me from the very first time I heard my dearest life partner “hum a tune” as he prepared to go to work each day. The happiness he felt about what he chose as a life long career threw me off kilter. Why was he so happy about work? What did he find so delightful? How could he be excited to go to work?? Of course, I realized quickly that his work was like play! He loved his trade and was thrilled at the prospect that he not only got paid to do it, but that he was allowed to do it! He was qualified to do the work he dreamed of doing and make a living to boot! How totally thrilling!!! I knew then that’s what I wanted too. I’ll return to this storyline as I continue to blog along, but long story short, I have been slowly and steadily making my way to reaching the goal of finding my “play” job, or if truth be told, my dream life since that initial spark of inspiration from Chris 17 yeas ago. I may not “hum a tune” everyday, but finally I’m getting there!!! And this year I will just be “me” and hopefully get there a whole lot faster. No more excuses and distractions, just fearlessness and being me whist humming Nelly Furtado’s ‘Forca’ daily !!